Dirty jokes
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A truck driver was going down a steep incline when, at the foot of the hill, he was able to make out a couple having sex in the middle of the road. Five times on his descent he sounded his horn, but they didn't move. He finally brought the truck' to a halt inches from them. The truck driver got out and stormed: "What the hell's the matter with you two?.Didn't you hear me? You could have been killed!" The man replied nonchalantly: "Listen, I was coming, she was coming, and you were coming. You were the only one with brakes."
A woman went to the doctor and complained that she was suffering from I knee pains. "Do you indulge in any activity that puts a lot of pressure on your knees?" asked the doctor. "Every night, my husband and I have sex on the floor doggy style." "I see," said the doctor. "You know, there are plenty of other sexual positions?" "Not if you want to watch TV there ain't!"
Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters." So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need." So Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now?" he asked. "Who needs girls?" said Pinocchio.
Q: What did the leper say to the hooker?
A: Keep the tip.
Q. What do you call 1,000 heavily armed lesbians?
A. Militia Etheridge
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